Naturally Chic

Just had a conversation with my parents that has left me so hurt and unloved, I don’t even know what to do.  They both asked me to come into their room for a talk, which should have been my 1st clue that some shit was about to go down.  They asked me to sit down and were saying they were so proud that I’ve been eating healthier and working out daily.  I thanked them.

Their next statement fucked me up.  They had the fucking GALL to suggest I get gastric bypass surgery and an assload of other cosmetic surgeries so I’d be prettier.  They seriously said “Honey, you can’t be happy that way.  We’ll pay for all the surgeries you want.”  I said I didn’t want any and why don’t they help me pay off my damn student loans instead.

My mother then went through the list of her suggested surgeries.  She was so fucking chipper about it.  “We’ll start with a gastric bypass, then you’ll get body contouring to get the skin removed and get your body shaped, then lipo in the stubborn spots, then you can get breast implants so they’ll look nicer, then the last thing we’ll do is get your nose shaved down!” It took everything in me not to say BITCH, WHAT?!? 

I was shocked.  I couldn’t believe they came to me like that and suggested that I’m not good enough.  Clearly they’ve forgotten all my problems with anesthesia.  Last time I had a surgery, the anesthesia caused my heart rate to drop so low I almost died.  So you want me to willingly go through that again for an unnecessary surgery? FUCK THAT, FUCK YOU, AND FUCK ALL THAT.

I guess none of that matters as long as you leave a thin, “pretty”, Anglo-fied corpse.